After about a month of back and forth e-mails with author and life coach Victoria Moran, I finally was able to sit down with her and discuss her general zeitgeist about life, money, cultural anthropology and fake boobies.

Weetabix: From your website and specifically your latest title, Fat, Broke And Lonely No More, you seem to draw a connection between weight and spending habits. What's that about?

Victoria: We try to take care of these feelings of discomfort, of not being enough, and maybe it's ice cream and maybe it's new shoes, it's whatever might change that icky feeling inside. The problem is that if you turn to that stuff too much, you're going to end up with weight you don't want or debt you don't want.

Weetabix: Do you think that one is indicative of the other? That people who have issues with their weight can't manage their spending?

Victoria: There are certainly people who have those mindsets. It's sort of the American default mode. If you just take the path of least resistance, you're going to end up--in this time, in this culture--fat, broke and lonely, or at the very least, two out of three. It's because of the kind of food that is plentiful; the ease of living a sedentary life; easy credit; and a mobile society. You have to really make an effort to defy that.

Weetabix: Why do you think our culture has come to this point? What brought us here?

Victoria: It's economic. People in the '50s liked going to hamburger joints and there were a couple in every town--now there are hundreds of thousands everywhere. People found ways to make a good living by giving the rest of us what we wanted. Now we have to work really hard to keep from living in the repercussions.

Weetabix: What are your tips for preventing yourself from sliding down this slippery slope that our culture has created?

Victoria: You have to be willing to create the kind of life that works for you, even if it's very different from the life that people around you may be living. If everyone in your office goes out for fast food every day and you go over to the Chinese place that will steam you some tofu and broccoli, you may look a little odd but your BMI and cholesterol levels will outshine everyone else in your office. Do I want to be like everyone else or do I want to avoid the problems that everyone else has? Those are the questions you ask yourself. If you do what everyone else does, then you're going to be what everyone else is.

Weetabix: If you're looking at bad role models, certainly, but it's hard when your peer group is full of people who are having the same problems as you are. So we should look outside of that structure?

Victoria: "Find out who isn't fat and do what they do." Let's look around and see--without being obsessive about it--which people around the world tend not to get fat. Athletes, dancers, vegans, Asians, and people on the national weight registry. These people are not on diets (well, maybe the dancers are); they are people who are moderately active, they eat breakfast, they eat natural carbohydrates and balanced diets. And look at Americans 30 years ago: Obesity rates have doubled between 1980 and 2000.

Weetabix: Microwave ovens?

Victoria: Microwaves, more fast food, high fructose corn syrup, more eating out, the weight-loss experts stopped saying "Don't eat between meals," we went from four TV stations to hundreds. The computer happened, so now we can shop and socialize and whatever all while sitting in a chair. We turned into a society where our culture is telling us to look thin but have big boobs, which for most people isn't even possible.

Weetabix: My friends are all at a variety of fitness levels. We all have perceived imperfections that might be related to weight but might still even be there at our perfect BMI because not everyone can be the body type of the moment. Like, maybe your thighs are always going to be X percent bigger than your calves, you know? How do we get out of that mindset?

Victoria: Women have always been driven to live up to their cultural ideal. We're no different from the young women who go to fattening camps in Mauritania. But if you focus on your life rather than the size of your thighs, the first priority of your life will be what you came to this planet to do. How do you want to leave this world better? If you can put that in the driver's seat (and stick your thighs in the back) it works out better. You're still going to eat well, you might eat even better because you want the energy to go out and get what you want. You might want to go to the gym for the boost of energy from the endorphins, rather than how it makes your thighs look.

Weetabix: That's so smart and exactly aligns with Elastic Waist's mission. Love yourself, feel good, eat healthy and rock on. When did you get so smart, Victoria?

Victoria: Twenty-three years ago was the day I knew that I had truly truly a problem with food, and not that I just liked to eat and was overweight. I went out for my nice diet-looking lunch and I paid for it with the only credit card that wasn't maxed out. And I realized that I wanted to be alone with my lunch more than I wanted to contribute to the stability of my family.

Weetabix: Wow. A defining moment! What did you do differently after that?

Victoria: I put truly taking care of myself ahead of losing weight, because I had lost weight dozens of times and that clearly wasn't the answer. The next thing I did was get it into a 24-hour plan. I couldn't look at it as how much weight can I lose before my next class reunion, so I just looked at what I was going to do in the next 24 hours to make myself better. The next thing I did was a little controversial, but I started eating 3 meals a day, because as a compulsive eater, grazing was a license to binge. I also got a lot of help.

Weetabix: Help from whom?

Victoria: I found people who had been down this path before me, and didn't do it alone. I think the main reason there is a high recidivism rate for people is because they are trying to do it alone. I teamed up with another person: we call it "action partners." We check in every single day, just for a short conversation, and say, "This is what I'm going to do today to get me closer to where I want to be." It's nice to know that there's one other person who is 100% committed to my success and her own. This is similar to a life coach.

Weetabix: That makes perfect sense. That fits with studies of people who have lost significant amounts of weight and keep it off: they often have a partner of some kind. Do you think that's the key?

Victoria: If you haven't pursued the destiny you've envisioned, you're going to go back and eat again. The weight loss has to be part of your life, and your life has to be fabulous. It has to be richly textured and injected every day with a few of the elements that make you feel happy, fulfilled, useful and gratified--all of the things you may have been looking for in food.

Weetabix: Do you have any tips or advice for our readers?

Victoria: When the conversation shifts to your weight, just change the subject. Whether it's something about how you look fantastic for losing weight, or someone saying, "You shouldn't wear that dress," it's nobody's business. The same people who will tell you how great you look are the same people who will stand behind the water cooler and gossip about how many pounds you've gained back. It's nobody's business.

Victoria Moran is the author of six books (including her latest, Fat, Broke and Lonely No More). She has appeared on Oprah, and knows how to rock a set of bangs like nobody's business. She is also totally Weetabix's latest girl crush.