She's Probably Frigid: Add Kelly Brook to the nauseating subset of celebrities who really think we believe this "Oh, I eat whatever I want and don't really have to work at staying slim. Now I'm off to eat another Big Mac!" shit. Seriously, bitch please, save it for Billy Zane.

Bergdorf Goodbuy: The Olsen twins have launched their affordable fashion line called Elizabeth and James (after their brother and sister, how sweet). It's so affordable that we're going to snatch up at least three of the $1,000 jackets, and maybe a few dozen $90 T-shirts!

Smell My Feet: This Halloween, don't be the house that gives sucky candy like Smarties or Tootsie Rolls, hook up your ghosts and goblins with the hottest candy and they might just think you're the most awesome adult around.

Take That, Swanson: Love Thomas Keller's cooking but can't wait two months for a reservation at French Laundry? His cuisine is coming to a microwave near you. Somewhere, Julia Child just did a triple gainer in her grave.

Caveman Chic: We see a lot of batshit crazy things walk down the runways, and here's a nice synopsis of all that's fit to not wear from London's Fashion Week. But hey, maybe the unibrow is making a resurgence?

Like You Needed a Reason: Guess what's making our kids fat this week? You're not going to believe it. Seriously, though, ditch the Crocs unless you're a gardener or a TV chef. They are the fugliest shoes in all of creation and are going to be the acid-washed jean of the Aughts. (via BigFatBlog)

Weighty Matters: Just once, we'd like to list our weight on our driver's license as "Hulk Hogan."

Photo Credit: Splash