I'm a big fan of Odwalla juices, because they taste extra juicy somehow, really bright and lovely and they hit me with a little ping in the backs of my cheeks, and I like that, so I thought I'd try the Odwalla Bar! That last sentence wasn't supposed to be extra exciting with an exclamation point, actually, but rather a true representation of the product's name. You see, Odwalla loves their Odwalla Bar!s so much they trademarked the name with an exclamation point. To which I have to give them a nod of appreciation because it is very sneaky, this attack punctuation right there in the name. I should probably change my name to Weetabix! (TM) and then everyone would be forced to say my name extra-excitedly. And then I'd have to explain to them that the (TM) was silent.

But back to the Bar! This particular flavor was Berries GoMega (TM), because if the exclamation point wasn't enough to convince you of the powerful awe-inspiring nature of this bar, then damn it, the flavor is going to have a verb in it and also be missing a subject.  Berries Go Mega where exactly? Is Mega a place? Is it the mall? Could they pick me up a Jamba Juice because damn, this bar tastes nasty. And that is the sad truth of the matter. The taste of the bar (excuse me, Bar!) is very lacking and weirdly reminiscent of the be Powered bars I tried last month, although in this situation I made it through half the bar before deciding that I didn't really feel like consuming the second half of 220 calories just to confirm my decision that I didn't like it. And at a wimpy 5 grams of protein and enormous 41 grams of carbs, half of which were due to sugars, it just didn't have the numbers to convince me that it's a good meal replacement. Granted, the big pluses advertised on the very attractive raspberry and lime colored package were all of the essential omega-3 fatty acids and flax seed, but seriously, omega-3s, what have you done for me lately? Are you going to get me through my morning meeting without the embarrassing tummy rumbles that usually start around 10:30? Somehow I doubt it. Sorry Odwalla, it's a no go. I should have realized that you were trying too hard with that exclamation point. I still love you for your juices though. --Weetabix