Apparently, someone has finally figured out that men and women lose weight differently.

We don't think this is news to anyone. Jared Fogle lost a significant amount of weight eating two meals with chips at Subway, and when we went on the Subway diet, we were starving and ended up gaining weight with all of those bready carbs. Our college boyfriends lost it by only ordering two dozen rather than four dozen Buffalo wings every night at the local pub. Ugh.

Sure, evolution has set men up with nice souped-up metabolisms and given them lots of muscles to burn calories, but according to the study, they are also approaching it differently. Essentially, women play at weight loss while men go to war.

"Hello, nutritional goals. Prepare to meet your maker!"

Um, no. Doesn't work. We would like our nutritional goals to have a peaceful relationship, perhaps with trade embargos on doughnuts and chocolate.