I'm throwing around the word "chef" a little loosely, because really, it seems as though Nigella is just showing you how to slap dash a few things together. She never measures things. She never washes her hands. I really wouldn't want to eat at Nigella's house, but damn if I don't want her to cook for me, as long as I can watch. Because you know that she'd give you the frosting beaters to lick clean.

Maybe that's it. She's one of the few female television cooks who actually eats things. Oh, Giada de Laurentis is certainly beautiful, but when it's time to sample she takes a tiny plate and a microscopic bite, whereas Nigella is hungry. She doesn't sample, she slurps, nay, devours. She eats things off of her fingers and smacks her lips and then pads off to the refrigerator in the middle of the night to dig into cold leftovers. It's just so... well, sensual.

And maybe that's the secret. It's not what you eat, but how you eat it that really brings the sexy. So tonight, I'm making the boy some cupcakes. And damn it, I'm going to eat them too. Nice and slow.

-Weetabix